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These double-ended toys have a bulb end for the wearer to insert, and a shaft end with which to penetrate the receiver. It’s tempting to don rose-colored glasses when considering these toys. The “strapless strap-on” category of sex toy didn’t exist until a crafty lesbian developed and patented the design of the Feeldoe, which she brought to Tantus for production in the early ’00s.Bodies can get closer, the toy is more integrated to sex, and partners feel more connected. For some good old-fashioned fun, I highly recommend poking around the inventor’s website, which is very gay, delightfully outdated, and laden with clipart and GIFs.My favorite quote: “We don’t supply any pictures of naked people. ” Now, many sex toy peddlers have released their own strapless strap-ons: Vixen, Fun Factory, Happy Valley, Wet for Her. In bed with Aerie, staring at the spread before us, I realized, who wants to have such scientific sex? Like consummate professionals, we spent hours having mediocre sex, pausing frequently to take borderline-illegible notes in a notebook. PROBLEM #1: one thing we learned early in our testing was that, unless the dildo wielder is wearing a harness, they often have to keep their legs together to keep the toy from slipping out of their body.

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I’ve never thought strapless strap-on dildos were the second coming of Christ. I have my Joque harness, I have well-loved strap-on dildos, and I am comfortable combining those things and fucking someone silly.

I’ve never felt like strap-on sex wasn’t “intimate” enough, or like I needed extra genital stimulation in order to enjoy it.

Consequently, the wearer can barely guide the shaft into their partner without help and can’t tell what’s going on down there without verbal confirmation. Aerie couldn’t hold the bulb in, even while clenching, because the toy was trying to fight its way out in order to spring back into shape.

For me, ironically, the Share Vibe was both the one that locked into place best the one I wanted out of my body the soonest.

Aerie was on top of me on the couch, normally a favorable position, and they had to into me to avoid feeling poked internally.

It occurred to me in this moment that the Share Vibe would work if we were both ghosts, able to drift into each other. PROBLEM #3: the wearer’s bulb side is too big, too long, too uncomfortable.I’d much rather watch someone go to town on Buck while I hold a vibe on my clit.PROBLEM #5: the experience of using these toys is far from seamless, and in fact most of the time is actively unpleasant.Whereas a strap-on would generally sit atop my mons, these are all too heavy and floppy. In cowgirl, with me wearing the toy, the length and position of the shaft prevented Aerie from rubbing their clit against my body — which they’re able to do with penises and regular strap-on dildos.In Aerie’s words: “well cool, you just ruined the one thing that I wanted from being on top.” The Share Vibe was the exception to this rule, but not in a good way.Aerie refused to wear the cervix-punching Tango and became increasingly annoyed with the bulb shape of the Share Vibe, which was bothering their cervix clamping against their vagina — a pressure which intensified with the addition of vibration. When I wore the Share Vibe, I understood immediately: it felt like it was giving me cramps.

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